Friday, 17 March 2017

Limbo

It's almost 2 weeks since my last training update and I figured I may as well post today rather than Sunday as nothing will change between now and then. Sunday is race day for my favourite local hill race - Criffel.  I entered the race when it first went online, and with it being part of the Scottish Hill Championships this year I watched as some amazing names started appearing on the entry list.  I felt torn: would I run my favourite little race or would I spectate - find one of my favourite gnarly bit and watch how the pros race? I no longer feel torn as that decision has been taken away from me and I will be spectating. I am not sure I ought to be climbing to the gnarly bits but I really don't want to miss out completely. It will be less than a mile each way so I am hoping no damage is done.


Given that I have no even been allowed to walk a mile for the past 2 weeks I am aiming to stay optimistic despite not really having a clue what's going on or what I can do about it.  Am I injured? Yes, but a diagnosis is still unclear.  Am I ill? Kind of.  I don't pretend to understand all the science behind everything that's going on, but I'm trying to stay upbeat despite the pain. I am not allowed ANY kind of exercise beyond what it takes to do my job and be a parent.


It's a strange place to be. Not being allowed to do ANYTHING. And it's definitely not good for my waistline. Surprisingly I'm not completely losing the plot. I'm not thinking about SDW100 at all.  Because if I do, well, it wouldn't be positive, so the door is closed on that for the time being. I don't know when/if I'll be able to run again.  I suspect that I will, but I don't really know. I'm completely in limbo. And if I can run, I am literally going to have a mountain to climb to find the runner that has disappeared deep down inside this broken body. And even then, 3 months until a 100miler - even for the pros that's a bit of an ask.


The spirit is still there. The spirit is willing, the spirit is able. The body on the other hand, well the body is somewhere else completely.  But that's ok.  This year so much has happened. Oftentimes things seem beyond your control, and I am slowly learning to not fight against that. We can't control everything in life, so  we have to learn to roll with the punches. It doesn't always work out how you expect. So take one day at a time and if life gives you a chance, then take it, because you don't always get a second one.




Weight - don't ask
Diet - appalling
Exercise - I think I've covered that - big fat zero
Mood - hey ho
Sleep - unsettled
Songs -


Tilted (Christine and the Queens)
Day Drinking (Little Big Town)
Elysium (Bear's Den)
Human (Rag'n'Bone Man)
Mountains (Biffy Clyro)
Tennessee Whiskey (Chris Stapleton)
It's like that (Run-DMC feat Jason Nevins)
One Dance (Drake)


The music is super varied just now, especially as I'm not using it for running.


A bit of inspiration: “A Shepherd's Hand” https://vimeo.com/190055040




Who knows where the path will lead.

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